It has been a long week. A glorious, family filled, memory making week. But boy, was it long. Seriously.
I cringe at myself as I sit here tonight, the last night of “break,” as I excitedly think about the kids going to school tomorrow and the joy of routine.
And as I type those words, I feel the need to remind you, to remind me, of this truth: I love my children. I love my family. They are blessings to me. I truly believe that. I truly know that to be true. I am beyond thankful and grateful for them. Even in the moments of frustration. Always.
I love decorating for Christmas. I love getting to decorate while the kids help and put their own joy into the festivities. Until that moment. You know the one: when the bickering just doesn’t stop. The whining won’t end. And I can’t take it anymore. I can’t handle the fun moments because those frustrating ones have overtaken them all. And I begin to cringe that the memories aren’t quite as lovely as I had hoped. They aren’t quite as perfect as they were in my head.
You’re a good good father.
It’s who you are, it’s who you are.
And I’m loved by you.
It’s who I am, it’s who I am.
And there. That grace. It isn’t leaving me. It isn’t running away because I’m not perfect enough. It isn’t fleeing, casting me aside because I got frustrated. No. Instead it’s reminding me that there is grace. That God loves me. And that He is a perfect father. To me and to my children. And He loves me. Period. Without anything on my part. Simple love. Grand love. Overwhelming love. And so, even when I mess up, I can stand firm. Knowing who I am.
I am loved.
And so tomorrow is coming. Bringing with it a new day. For me, it will bring a chance to apologize for my grumpiness. It will bring forgiveness and hugs. It will bring a new start to this advent season.
Do you need the reminder of grace, as we enter this holiday season? Because friend, it is for you.