Quiet. What an elusive idea. I find that our lives can be so full. So distracting. So loud. That we miss the quiet, though oftentimes we don’t even realize we are missing it. We miss the beauty in the simple. And we miss grace.
Thinking on quiet + motherhood + wholeness, I hit a roadblock. Honestly, I have another post ready and typed. But I just couldn’t publish it yet. Something is missing. Something isn’t right. So instead, today, you get this. These quiet thoughts. That are both real and vulnerable. Honest, and I hope they meet you right where you are. Searching for quiet. Searching for grace. Searching for truth.
Today I began reading Genesis. I finished my journey through the Psalms and have decided to read through the Bible for the rest of this year. So today began where it all began, “In the beginning…”. I have read these verses time and time again. But today, today I noticed one verse that I had never really noticed before:
“The earth was without form and void and darkness was over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters.” (Genesis 1:2)
There is something about this verse, about these 2 simple sentences that stops me right where I’m at. They shout loudly and whisper quietly at the same time. They speak straight to my soul. We were without form. Void. Empty. Darkness, sin, had come upon us. Entered into the beautiful. Darkness was over us. Around us. In us. But. But that was not how we were left. But God. But God entered in. He saw us where we were. Empty. Lifeless. And He hovered over us. Preparing us for life. Preparing to speak life over us. Through us. In us.
As I sit and think on these words. I think about the quiet. The deep. The real. The beautiful. And of course, the grace. Always the grace.
I know that life is loud. I know that children are loud. I know that the things I surround myself with are loud. All vying for my attention. But when I enter into quiet. When I intentionally choose to still my heart. To sit quietly with my Lord. To read His words. I grow. I see that grace. I see His never ceasing, abounding love. And I feel quiet. I feel calm. I feel peace.
After my last post, This Is How We Do It: Me Time, I realized I need to share a few things. So here we go, Me Time Part II.
So many have commented that they squeeze in me time during naps and bed times. Me too, friends, me too! Are you kidding, I think the only way I have any sanity left, are those glorious breaks in the day, where technically my children are supposed to be quietly napping! The last 5 years have been like that for me too. I even switched my 1 year old to one nap/day earlier than he really should have so that my two youngest could nap at the same time. That is how much I
needed need naps/quiet times to happen. Right now, I find myself in a strange place where my eldest is in school every day, my second is in school 3 mornings a week, my third is in school every morning, and I am left with one child. That coupled with the strange 1-2 hour break in the morning, basically waiting to pick up the kids from preschools, has given me this glorious time that I can intentionally carve out for me. Well me and a few random errands, diaper changes, laundry, and dishes. But mostly for me. (Truth time, right now, I am also using it to go through a box or two that never got unpacked from our basement.)
And come summer, I will have to start again with finding a perfect time for me. Sadly, with my 2 olders, nap time is less about me and more about the older kids. I pray I can still find a way to carve out some morning time for me, and some independent time for the kids. If I’m honest, having them all home with no plans FREAKS ME OUT. I love having slow mornings, and
I think I know quiet time is so important. So this is me, honestly telling you, I may have a great quiet time schedule right now, but in a month, I will be back in the old boat – scrambling trying to scavenge a few minutes from our day here and there, that can be just for me – to help me grow and find rest.
SOME DAYS ARE JUST PLAIN HARD
I am so excited to be co-hosting this link up, once again, with my friend Lori from The Boutelle Family. Especially on a topic so close to my heart – me time, quiet time, crafting time, writing time…whatever you want to call it – that time when you are doing something for yourself.
DEFINING ME TIME
For me, me time has looked like a lot of different things: I enjoy reading and writing, so when I make time to do those activities – that can be me time. I also enjoy crocheting and scrapbooking – more me time. I have enjoyed exercising and really, need to start that up again…but that’s a discussion for another day. My most important me time, is the time I spend in the Bible.
Though these actions can occur during my me time, the sole act of them happening does not mean I am enjoying me time. Having an Etsy shop, I have had to find time to crochet. However, there were times that my crocheting time – which is usually a me time – became more about my small business than about my rest, my growth. The me time hobby was there, but the growth and rest were completely missing and were replaced with deadlines and stress.
Your me time may look similar or it may look completely different – and that’s great! Because me time is such a personal thing, everyone’s me time will look different. In the end there are two characteristics of me time that apply to everyone.
I like to think of me time as a time where I am doing something that is growing me. Me time is also about finding rest for your soul.